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Saturday, 5 November 2011

To shame or not to shame? That is the question!

Come on, we've all been there. Ok, maybe not the tee-totallers, but most of us have. Let's be honest, I know I have been there, and on more than one occasion, I must add. What am I on about, you ask, ok I will elaborate.
You have a bad week at work, and/or something happen in your personal life. Or maybe you haven't eaten properly that day, or just maybe you have lost track of how much you have had to drink before you went out. You go with your friends for a night out on the town and for whatever reason, you decide that you will be a one person drinking machine!
Sometimes you wake up the next morning with hazy but happy memories of letting off steam and laughing with your friends, but unfortunately, sometimes it's worse. You regain conciousness with a phone full of messages asking if you are ok, you have the hangover that Satan would be proud of and to top it off zero memory after a certain time. You are filled in by your companions later on that you were declaring love to unsuspecting strangers, you had drunk text your ex telling him you wished he was dead then in the next sentance proposing marriage and wanting his babies! You had your head down the toilet and sick down your top. You were crying, then you ended up being carried out of the club falling asleep.

Ok, I can here you saying "Yes, and the point to this is?" Alright I will explain what has got me on my soapbox. With the development of technology these days, for many a person, when a night out like this occurs, it doesn't just get pencilled down as experience, a mistake that can be made occasionally, just human nature from time to time, nope! For some unfortunate souls it becomes mandatory for pals whip out thier cameras and phones then splatter it all over the social netwoking pages for all to see, and how lovely is that? It no longer is just something that you want to forget about as soon as possible, but something all your friends, family, work colleagues and even possibly your bosses can view and make judgement on. Its there, and permanently, for others to look at. It happened to one girl I know, and I am outraged on her behalf! What on earth did she do so wrong that caused someone to think it would be nice to post these pictures up. I would bet this girl has bought the guilty man drinks, given him lifts etc, what a nice way to pay her back!

It got me thinking, what kind of mates are we if we take pictures of our friends in these states, post them on facebook and/or click 'like' afterwards. What has given us the right to name and shame our friends and make it public? Is this one step away from internet bullying? Are we all turning nasty? Plus now, with all the other things on our minds do we really have to worry that we could log onto our pages and be confronted with the pictorial evidence that our so called mates thought would be 'Hilarious'.

 What we need to think about is how it will affect the person in question. They could be really ashamed, It could get them fired, they could have strict families or partners that could react in a nasty way, we just don't know. Wouldn't it just be fairer to take your friend home, put them to bed and check on them the next day, all the time whilst keeping your phones and cameras safely tucked away. Isn't that what a real friend does, or at least attempt to sober them up and generally be there for them. According to what I've seen, it appears not, instead we make it public and laugh at their misfortune.

It was also down to Derren Brown's Experiments; The Gameshow, that I felt I had to defend this girl. The show in question looked at faceless people who decided the fate of an unsuspecting man. With this programme Derren taught me that you always have an option, to do good or to do bad. Would I become a faceless person laughing at my mate who had the joy of having these pictures posted? No I would not! The male friend of hers who thought it would be fun to post the photos not only invited others to laugh, but also to comment. If he didn't like what I wrote on the pics, well, tough! He had option A, not to take them or post them, but he chose option B, and in doing so caused me voice my opinion on the matter. It also made me contemplate naming and shaming him, but then would that be choosing option B myself and becoming nasty? Maybe, yes, and I am not that person, it's not in my nature. I am safe in the knowledge that my friends and I are genuine and wouldn't dream of taking such pictures of each other, and when it comes to options, I am proud to say I would choose option A each time

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